Star Wars Sucks

I have some painful words to admit, and I fully blame Calvin for making me say this. So here it goes. Start Wars isn’t really that good.

That’s right. You read correctly. The Star Wars prequels suck. Calvin has fallen in love with Star Wars. I should be happy. But he doesn’t like the Star Wars I grew up on, he likes the new prequels that really suck.  All afternoon I’ve been forced to endure these horrible movies. I’ve had to act like I was paying attention so I could respond to his countless questions. If for no other reason I had to be awake to read the subtitled parts to him.

So many people have decried, insulted, attacked and derided the films – and they have been correct.

• “The acting is no good.”
• “The scripts were terrible.”
• “Jar Jar Binks is annoying.”
• “I don’t like the CGI.”

It isn’t like the old Star Wars were works of art but they had the good sense to be short. This hid most of the bad acting and plot holes. These new movies never end. It is as if they said “if they can’t be good – make them long!”

I will admit, on some level I’m jealous. I wish I could love these new movies like Calvin does. I want my youth back.  I didn’t see Calvin moaning and wailing about the quality of dialogue. He just enjoyed the movie. Just like I did as a youngster. I ignored the flaws in the original Star Wars films because I enjoyed them.  George Lucas was never the world’s greatest wordsmith, and never claimed to be. Episodes 4, 5, and 6 don’t exactly read like Shakespearian sonnets. 

I won’t sour this for Calvin. He deserves to get to enjoy Star Wars. I know someday he will grow up and will learn the cruel realities of this world that – Star Wars really isn’t that good. Until then, let him enjoy those crappie movies!